Coffee for one

Alan and I shared a love for coffee. I would say, Alan was more the coffee connoisseur than I was, since he always took his coffee black, no creamer or sugar. I, on the other hand, like my creamer with coffee..lol. Alan said the only way to truly taste the coffee was without all the “tooty fruity stuff” mixed in it. Alan could drink coffee anytime of the day, if it was offered, he would take it. Lili would say, “I hate daddy’s coffee breathe.” He and I used to take Lili to the used book store for her to recycle old books and use her money to buy new ones. In the book store is a coffee shop called Calypso Café. He got to know the owner well, as he would try to stop while on duty, for a cup of coffee. I always knew when he went because he would come home with coffee pouches for us and our coffee maker. We would enjoy our morning coffee together on the weekends and when we traveled, would always try to find some exotic coffees around to experiment with. When my mom lived with us a few years ago, she too would drink coffee with us, so of course my coffee maker got a lot of use. We went through many coffee makers in our 16 years together, some better than others. As we got older, we totally loved looking at different types of coffee makers and coffees like we were little kids on Christmas morning opening gifts. It was a few weeks after Alan died that I decided to make some coffee. I remember filling up the coffee maker to the top, as I did before. Then, as I started to scoop the coffee into the filter I stopped and I put the scoop down and cried. I cupped my hands over my eyes as I cried long and hard. I didn’t need to make that much coffee and I then realized I would be the only one drinking coffee from now on. No more days of sharing a cup of coffee over good conversation with my best friend. Then I thought of ALL the coffee cups in the cabinets…do I really need all of them? So I stopped crying, made myself one cup of coffee and used the rest of the morning to clean out the kitchen cabinets while blasting some 80s rock music. “You CAN do this, Michelle.” I would hear that whisper in my ear while cleaning and re-organizing my cabinet. When all was said and done I now had a handful of coffee mugs that I could use and share but not so much that it would occupy too much space. I took the cups and other miscellaneous items to the goodwill then headed to Walmart to check out some coffee makers. I had been eyeballing the Keurig single cup, light blue one for some time. I don’t think it ever made sense or even felt right buying it before. I knew Alan would be opposed because he didn’t really like to have to do too much work to make a cup of coffee then he might complain that he would have to do the process over and over since he drinks coffee throughout the day. I was playing all these scenarios in my mind as I proceeded through the check-out line to pay. I got home and unplugged the old coffee maker, then removing it from the counter. I placed my new Keurig on the counter with this one thought in my mind… “Well, I guess it is coffee for one.”